Nazis Archives — The Rational Heathen

When Radical Christians Co-opt Religious Symbols

September 1, 2022 The Rational Heathen Comments 1 comment

I read a really interesting piece in The Atlantic on how radical Christians (mostly rad-trad or radical-traditional Catholics) have co-opted the rosary as a tool of violence. I can’t help thinking about how the Nazis took our runes and Heathen symbols to use to promote their cause. There are some pretty scary parallels there.

What the Radical Christians Are Doing

Their latest fad is to drape rosaries over their semi-automatic rifles (usually AR-15s), take pictures of them, and posting them. It’s a not-so-subtle threat to those of us who don’t have their beliefs that they believe themselves warriors of their god. Nevermind that Jesus always preached peace. But why the fuck would they want to listen to that Jew anyway? (Assuming he even existed.) They’re a bunch of Nazis, anyway.

Why I Find this Objectionable

I have no problem with someone owning an AR-15 or some other semi-auto rifle. Their choice. I have no objections to people owning prayer beads or rosaries or whatever. Hel’s bells, back when I was Catholic, I prayed on those. I still own rosaries and other prayer beads inherited from my parents and in-laws. What I object to is the blatant and crass use of their religion and religious beliefs with the not-so-subtle underlying threat of violence.

It makes me want to go all Viking on them.

Radical Christians are Co-opting Sacred Symbols for Hate

I never thought in a million years that something like the rosary would be used for hate. But then, if there had been any true Heathens around the time of Nazi Germany, they probably would felt the same way on seeing the adoption of the sun wheel, Irminsul, runes, and our myths as being a reason for attacking and slaughtering millions. The similarities are staggering.

What’s more, it seems the more rad-trad the Christians are, the more alt-right they are. Or more appropriately, the more Nazi they are. And they are using holy symbols as a way of giving their cause validation in the eyes of their god. A god who is basically a Canaanite god that was adopted by the Hebrews and later by the Christians.

Make no mistake: radical Christians are dangerous. And the more dangerous they are, the more likely they’ll become embolden and go after people who aren’t like them. That includes minorities and people who don’t worship their god. People like us.

More Issues with Radical Christians

Case in point: radical Christians are also getting bolder when it comes to pagan gatherings. According to the Religious News Service, Christian groups are now harassing pagan festivals with bullhorns and preaching to try to deter generally peaceful pagan gatherings. And apparently law enforcement isn’t doing a lot to stop them. Imagine what would happen if a pagan group was to interrupt a Christian gathering? I guarantee they’d get arrested.

It’s truly as if the radical Christians want a violent confrontation so that the pagans end up looking bad. Because Christians would never resort to violence. <koff> For some reason the Crusades, the Spanish Inquisition, and most of the witch trials spring to mind. Call me crazy.

Taking the High Ground

It feels odd to tell those of us whose ancestors were Vikings to not get into a brawl with these radical Christians, but that’s exactly what I’m going to do. We will not win this if we’re being shown as instigators in a fight. Even if we’re not the instigators, the fact we resorted to violence would come off as bad. Because the group that throws the first punch loses in this. The media will eat this up and we will look like the aggressors. Okay by you? You might have won the fight, but you lost the war in the court of public opinion. Look no further than Antifa. Hel’s Bells, they’re listed as a terrorist organization. Think about that a moment. Heathens aren’t terrorists, or shouldn’t be.

Time to Make Ourselves Heard

Even so, it’s time we make ourselves heard. The Christian extremists are bullies. They expect for us to back off every time. We can’t; otherwise, they win. But we can do this with less risk. Pagan festivals need better security and work with law enforcement beforehand to let them know we expect help if the Christians come to call. Get on the law enforcement’s good side, even if the individuals don’t agree with our beliefs. It’s hard to put fault in someone obeying the law.

What You Can Do

You are not helpless. As a Heathen, you know this. Maybe you shouldn’t go toe-to-toe in combat with these fuckers, but you can make a difference.

What about your day-to-day life? Can you write? Start blogging and tell people about Heathenism. How about a podcast? A newsletter? Get creative. Get the word out any way you can. Don’t want to use your name? A-Okay. Use a pseudonym — many Heathens and pagans do, myself included. Hel’s bells, I’ll even talk about your endeavor if you tell me about it and I like it.

Don’t have time? Support those who promote pagans and Heathens, or even just freedom of religion. Maybe it might be a donation to The Wild Hunt, one of the bloggers on Patheos, or a favorite YouTube person. If you’re feeling particularly generous, even donate to my Patreon account (link below), if you think I’m doing a decent enough job promoting Heathenry. I’m not intentionally shilling for myself, but rather giving you ideas how you can make a difference.

Vote for candidates who don’t promote Christianity over other religions. Donate to their campaign funds, if you can. Or if you can’t, try volunteering to help the candidate’s campaign out. You can make a difference.

Be Safe

I don’t need to quote the Havamal to remind you to be wary. These are troubling times and the Christian extremists are going to great lengths to push their agenda. We need to push back, but in a safe manner. Don’t risk your life or the lives of your loved ones, because we need every single Heathen voice to stand firm. Use pseudonyms. Take precautions. You can still work against the Christian extremists without risking lives, especially your own. Stay within the law. Tyr wants it that way.

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The Ukraine Invasion, or the 800-Pound Bear in the Room

March 11, 2022 The Rational Heathen Comments 0 Comment

By the time you see this post, it’s likely the whole Ukraine invasion will have resolved itself one way or another. While I am staunchly in Ukraine’s corner, I have a terrible feeling that without the US putting boots on the ground, (or at least providing air support), that Russia will have a huge smoldering hole where the country of Ukraine was. Call me pessimistic, but I’ve been amazed the Ukrainians have held out as long as they have. They are one tough people.

A Madman with Nukes

The reason the US hasn’t gotten involved to a level greater than we already have with the Ukraine invasion is because we’re dealing with a madman with his finger on a very large arsenal of nuclear weapons. Putin’s saber rattling has to be taken seriously because we really don’t know how unstable he is.

At least when we were dealing with the USSR, we knew that the Soviets didn’t want to use their nukes as much as we didn’t.

History is Repeating Itself with the Ukraine Invasion

The Ukraine invasion feels like another invasion that happened about 83 years ago. At that time, another totalitarian regime attacked a smaller country while the world stood by and watched. Emboldened by the West’s response, that totalitarian asshole attacked and conquered other nations because nobody was willing to stand up to him.

You probably know that I’m drawing parallels between Hitler and Putin, and Poland and the Ukraine. This isn’t that big of a stretch. Whether they’re Nazis or Vlad’s Russians, the situations are striking similar. Sure, the Nazis were more motivated, but honestly, do you really expect Putin to stop with Ukraine? He sure as shit didn’t with the Crimea.

War Gods and War

If you look at our gods, you see quite a few war gods and goddesses. Odin, Freyja, Thor, and Tyr were all considered gods of war at one point or another. Cases could be made for other gods and goddesses as well. Because Northern peoples–in particularly Vikings–seldom lived past fifty years old. Dying from old age was rare. More likely you would die from disease, accidents, or war. Since war was likely due to the migration from Scandinavian countries, it makes perfect sense that the promise of going to Valhalla that much more desirable. Our gods were not only gods of nature, but gods of war. They had to be because war ruled our ancestors’ lives.

Why We Need to Dial Back the Russian War Machine

Nowadays, we live longer lives. Most of the time, those of us in the first world aren’t dealing first hand with the horrors of war. Sure, we sent soldiers to Kuwait, Iraq, Afghanistan, Vietnam, and other wars, but since WWII, Western nations have been at relatively, if not uneasy, peace. These wars didn’t affect our countries like they do with an actual invasion. Sure, there have been invasions and wars throughout Europe, mostly due to the Soviet Union and later, Russia, but the death toll and suffering has not been the same since WWII.

I’m not marginalizing the seriousness of other invasions and war across the globe. Syria, Georgia, Gaza, Lebanon, Somalia…the list of human suffering just within the 21st Century is staggering. But, Ukraine is different in one crucial way: it is the beginning of Putin’s attempt at bringing the borders of the USSR back to its pre-Berlin wall days. That means if Ukraine falls, it opens the Russian dictator towards other countries. And I doubt seriously that Putin will stop at the USSR borders.

The Cold War and Nuclear Threats

Sure, I lived under the threat of nuclear war during the Cold War. Yeah, I remember the whole bullshit “duck and cover” thing, as well as air raid drills. Honestly, I was too young to understand fully the ramifications of the drills; just like I had no idea that those drills wouldn’t have saved my life if we were hit with a nuclear bomb.

My first job out of college was working on nuclear missiles. The Cold War still existed and the threat was always there, but neither the US nor Russia really wanted to start armaggedon. After Reagan survived his assassination attempt, he was convinced he should work toward fewer nukes. The nukes I worked on had more warheads, but fewer missiles. Semantics, really.

But I understood the nuclear missiles were a deterrent. It was unlikely the US or the USSR would launched at each other. There were enough sane people in both camps to decide the risks of destroying both countries, let alone the planet, were too great.

Dealing with a Madman Sending Troops into Ukraine

I knew Putin was a thug and an asshole, but I hadn’t thought of him as a madman. But I should’ve known with the poisoning of Alexander Livinenko, Putin had no decency. Other high profile poisonings include Ukrainian presidential candidate, Viktor Yushchenko; Russian opposition leader, Alexey Navalny; and double agent, Sergei Skripal. This is a man who will stop at nothing to harm his enemies and critics.

It should surprise no one that Putin has had his people violate their ceasefire and attack civilians without remorse. Attacking children’s and maternity hospitals won’t even register with him because he is clearly a sociopath, and quite possibly a psychopath.

To be quite frank with you, the end game has me scared. The thought of another world war–probably with nukes–should terrify any sane person. But if we fail to stand up to Putin now, we will have a bigger problem in the not-so-distant future.

If you wish to send sunflower seeds to the Russian Embassy in solidarity with the Ukrainians, their address in Washington DC is: Embassy of Russian Federation, 2650 Wisconsin Ave NW, Washington, DC 20007.

If you want to help the Ukrainians, consider donating to one of the charities mentioned here.

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50 Shades of Nazis

November 7, 2021 The Rational Heathen Comments 3 comments

Nazis, seriously? A reader of this blog commented on a post of mine saying he’d be rather be called a Nazi over Antifa.

What is this world coming to? Seriously?

Kids, it’s not either/or. It’s “None of the Above.”

Nazis, Seriously?

How the fuck did we get to the point where people align themselves with the Nazis? The NAZIS, for the gods’ sake. These were the bad guys in WWII. They believed in a “master race,” even though race is a construct. Nazis believed in genocide. They committed countless atrocities.

No Communists, Either

I’m not a communist apologist, either. Stalin and Mao (to name a few) committed atrocities in the name of communism. Mass murders and genocide. Even today, communists oppress and murder people. People are not free under their regimes. According to the Washington Post, Antifa is the equivalent of leftist neo-Nazis. So, both Antifa and Nazis are bad.

Where the Wackos Meet

You go too far right or too far left, and the methodology of the institutions look the same. Oppression. Mass murder. Destruction of people’s rights. In fact, the sides who oppose each other start behaving like each other the farther right or left they go. Sure, their rhetoric might be different, but those are just words. I’m talking action.

If your side is the one talking about harming other people, murdering, or proposing lunacy instead of logic, you are part of the problem. You have become like your enemy, and I honestly can’t see any real difference.

Freedom, or Just a Way to Harm People?

In the United States, we value freedom. But freedom doesn’t mean you can do anything you want. Your behavior and rights stop where you are harming someone. In other words, I have the right to swing my fist all I want to as long as it doesn’t impact someone’s nose (or body). Likewise, I don’t have the right to cough on, breath on, or otherwise spread my germs on people during a pandemic. Yeah, wearing a mask sucks. Deal with it. Don’t want to get a vaccine? Don’t expect to keep your job in healthcare. Get a job that isn’t affected by the mandate.

Conspiracy Theories

Conspiracy theories abound on both sides of the political spectrum, but I hear more from the far right than the far left at the moment. People no longer use logic. Instead, the more fantastic the claim, the more they believe.

Look, if you (or anyone, for that matter), make a fantastic claim and expect me to believe it, you’d better have PROOF. And not a “well, Faux News says…” Give me testable, verifiable proof of your claim by legitimate sources. Because the more fantastic the claim is, the more proof you need.

You CAN Be Neither Far Right or Far Left

Honestly, people. You don’t have to throw in your lot with the goosesteppers of either camp. No, you don’t have to agree with everything one side says or another side says. You can use LOGIC to deduce which claims are true.

Nazis and Antifa followers are both wrong. You don’t have to follow either of them.

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An Insult to Tyr: the Attempted Coup

January 10, 2021 The Rational Heathen Comments 0 Comment

Like many of you, I watched in horror as the Trumpets broke into the Capitol building, violating laws, and making an attempted coup to keep the Don as dictator. I saw white supremacists, people wearing anti-Semitic messages including an Auschwitz t-shirt, and a guy sporting Heathen tats who got a lot of press. I was so angry and frustrated I could do nothing to stop these morons from desecrating the very symbol of the US democracy.

Where I Stand, So You Know

I’ve been accused of being liberal and conservative. The truth is, I’m closer to being Centrist. That means, I have both liberal and conservative tendencies. I hated both candidates, to make it known. In fact, I voted for neither. There are reasons why I didn’t like Biden, and why I didn’t like Trump. In fact, I find them both too extreme for my taste. So, understand what I’m about to say comes primarily from the viewpoint of why I believe the march on the Capitol building was no less then an act of sedition.

Why this was an Insult to Tyr

The Republican Party, for all intents and purposes, considered itself the champion of the rule of law. Now, you can argue about that all you want, but the march clearly showed otherwise. Tyr, as you know, is the god of law. That means he is the champion of the rule of law. No question.

This was a total insult to the god of laws. Tyr would have found those bearing the Valknut, Yggdrasil, and Mjolnir on their skin at the rally to be an insult. These people were nothing more than armed insurrectionists, looking to overthrow the legal results of an election using fear and intimidation.

Anything but Lawful

What happened during that march and subsequent riot was anything but lawful. Lots of Trump’s followers seem to have drank the Kool-Aid when it comes to the explanation the far-right is giving. That it was a peaceful march. That the problem occurred with law enforcement and the Capitol Police.

The reality is that what happened wasn’t legal. It was a fucking attempted coup. According to credible news reports, the rioters were looking for Vice President Pence and members of Congress to lynch. They had a working gallows in front of the Capitol, for fuck’s sake. Five people died and many more injured. All whipped up by none other than Donald Trump. None of this would have happened if Trump had not encouraged these people to march on the capitol. Seriously, did anyone really think that this would go well?

These people damaged the Capitol building. They desecrated what should be considered a sacred area for democracy. They also have harmed the United States, possibly irreparably, in the world opinion. We went from being a world leader to a Banana Republic in the matter of one day. And yeah, Trump is to blame for this.

Why We as Heathens Need to Speak Up Now

Whether you voted for Trump, Biden, or Obi-Wan Kenobi (He’s our only hope), the election process was not rigged. Each state has their own people handling the voting process, and many, many people work hard on the Republican, Democrat, and other parties’ sides to ensure a safe and secure election. Every time I voted in the past, I saw volunteers who worked hard in the past to ensure my vote was counted.

The same thing happens all over the United States. It’s part of representative democracy in action. Trump’s allegations of voter fraud were unfounded by people in his own party. These are people who he put into place who swore a duty to uphold the Constitution. Not pander to Trump or only uphold the Constitution when it was in Trump’s favor.

Not once did Trump or his legal counsel offer proof that there was widespread voter fraud. Instead, we heard allegations, lies, and half-truths. Only after his own aids begged him to make a statement to try to calm the crowd hours after the attempted coup started did he offer a lukewarm statement—neither condemning the actions nor stating he was wrong.

It’s Too Late to Hope this All Goes Away

Hope is not a plan. Whether you like it or not, we Heathens just got a black eye for tolerating this Nazi and white supremacist bullshit shit far too long. Don’t think so? Check out the Rolling Stone article. Quibble all you want about “how they got this wrong,” or “they got that wrong,” the truth doesn’t matter a flying fuck in the face of popular perceptions. (Yeah, a follower of Tyr just said that—deal with it.)

What now matters is that those of us who aren’t white supremacists and Nazis need clean house. That means ZERO TOLERANCE for morons who speak like white people are superior to everyone else and who supported this attempted coup. Kick them out of your hof; end their membership in your organization. As a follower of Tyr, I found the whole attempted coup insulting, especially when paired with the images of the Valnut, Yggdrasil, and Mjolnir. These people failed to follow the rule of law. This is not what Heathenry stands for. And we as Heathens should decry their behavior.

I don’t pretend to be perfect. I’m Human. I’ll sling mud at other religious beliefs with the best of them, but by the gods, I look at everyone of different ethnicities as human, no matter what their skin color is. And I don’t believe that anyone who believes differently should be physically harmed for their ideals, provided that they’re not harming others. Their (and my) rights to swing their fists ends where someone’s body begins. Murder is not an option.

I’m sorry this is a late post, but I really had to think about what I was going to say in response to this failed coup. If you’re a Heathen, Norse pagan, or whatever, now is the time to stand up for democracy and freedom, not totalitarianism and anarchy. Add your voice to those of us who already believe in equality under the law, in the rule of law, and in keeping the peace along with our elected representatives. Don’t stay quiet, or the assholes have won. Let the world know what Heathenry really is about. It’s about laws, justice, and speaking up when we see a wrong. Violence is not what we are.

Walking a Razor’s Edge: Folkish Beliefs

September 28, 2018 The Rational Heathen Comments 2 comments

A fan of mine and supposedly long time reader took umbrage on my statements about folkish beliefs in Heathenry. Never mind that I’ve been stating what I have been stating as long as I’ve had this blog, which puts me in direct opposition of folkish beliefs. Why? Because scientifically, archaeologically, anthropologically, and historically, none of the folkish beliefs have any basis in fact. Unless you count the past 100 years as a reason to be folkish, i.e. Nazi beliefs, there is no record of exclusion from Heathenry.

Anyway, the fan deleted our conversation, left in a huff, and unliked my page (There! That showed me!), giving me plenty to think about why folkish beliefs are a bad idea. So, without further ado, let’s get talking about what folkism is, why it’s racist, and ultimately in league with white supremacists.

What Folkish Beliefs Are

Let’s talk about the root of folkish beliefs. People who believe in folkish beliefs hold that Heathenry is only for those who are of Northern European descent. That our gods can only be worshiped by those whose ancestors lived in the Northern European lands. That our gods do not call to those who are not from those lands.

In other words, they do not believe in a multicultural religion. They believe that people should worship the gods of their ancestors, whichever those are.

Now, let’s talk about the fallacy of their arguments.

First, Some Evolutionary Facts

Let’s look at the human race, that is Homo sapiens. Our race came out of Africa at least 200,000 years ago, according to scientists, although latest findings suggest that our species came from there before that. I don’t want to quibble over time frame. The point is that we all came from a small group of humans. Those who eventually made their way up north eventually became Norse.

It’s not like humans beamed in there. It took a fair amount of time, walking, and generations of living in one place for a while before pushing on. We know that many of them were most likely black (even though there isn’t a specific gene for being black) due to the genetic material that we have found. Our species is black in Africa to provide some protection against the sun’s rays. As humans moved up north, our skin lightened to adjust to the lack of sunlight so that our bodies could make Vitamin D.

Genetics also shows that humans, as a species, nearly went extinct at least twice. We’re inbred apes, pure and simple, because of bullshit patriarchy and polygamy as well as sticking with kindreds. Yeah, I get that kindreds were needed back then to survive, but our genetic diversity as a species is sorely lacking because of it.

Racism as We Know it Today Was Nonexistent

Racism–that is, judging people on their physical appearance and skin color–was virtually nonexistent in Viking and Early Medieval times . People were judged according to their belief system and their allegiances, not their skin color. We know this because Marco Polo seldom mentioned skin color unless it added something to the story. Race was considered as religion. You were considered a different “race” if you were Heathen, Jewish, Christian, or some other religion. That gave people the excuse for barbaric acts (like they seldom needed an excuse?).

Not All Vikings Were White

We know that there was at least one “black” Viking, and yes, there are people who have Mongolian genetics in Iceland from him. We know that our Viking ancestors explored, traded, raided, raped, and pillaged all the way south to Africa, east well into Asia, north to Greenland, and west to North America. They found wives and husbands among indigenous folk and settled in those lands.

Some of our northern ancestors added the gods and religions to our pagan practices. Some fully adopted the other religions. We have Viking hoards with Buddha statues and other religious objects.

Heathen Religion in the Grand Scheme of Things

Now, given the facts I’ve presented (and if you have the doubts as to the veracity of my statements, I back them up in the links provided above), Heathens were pretty willing to take in others who swore allegiance to their leaders and their gods. It made a kindred stronger.

Our northern ancestors practiced a religion that came from an offshoot of a Proto Indo-European religion. That evolved from a much earlier Nostratic pantheon. The further back we go, the fewer religions we have. The fact that there are so many similarities in the Indo-European religions suggests that the ideas and gods came from a central source going back tens of thousands of years.

So, Let’s Talk Folkish

So, how does folkishness fit here? If you say it doesn’t, you get a star. Our northern ancestors didn’t differentiate where you came from. What they did care about was your religion and your loyalties. What was your kindred and whether you were a friend or foe. Given the overall dissemination of Nordic genes, we can assume that everyone had ancestors that lived in the overall Viking sphere of influence, including African tribes and Mongols. Even if this weren’t so, if someone who joined up with the Vikings, raided with them, and worshiped their gods, you can bet they would’ve had status in a kindred.

Segregation or Apartheid, Anyone?

If you take a chapter from history, what the folkish people are doing is the “separate but equal” bullshit that we saw in the United States in the form of segregation. Or the South African Apartheid. They’re saying, “Our religion is for white Europeans, but you have your own traditions. Go do those.” They shut out people just because of the random chance that they were born with different colored skin.

You are on the Razor’s Edge with this if You’re Folkish

Folkish people, you may not be Nazis, but you are so on a razor’s edge with this. What you are doing is racism, pure and simple. If a black person hears the call of Thor, shouldn’t he or she be allowed to practice Heathenry? If the answer is “no, because of their ethnicity” then yes, I am calling you a bigot. Why can’t a black person be a Heathen? Don’t give me that’s not their religion — they should stick to African religions. That is complete and utter bullshit. Separate is NOT equal. We know this from history. People fought hard to end segregation, and you’re dragging Heathenry down with your bigoted beliefs.

Furthermore, separate but equal is bullshit because we’re all the same race. We’re the same people with minor genetic variations. We are Homo sapiens, people. Most of us have a small amount of Neanderthal and Denisovian genes in our DNA, making us not even pure Homo sapiens but a mutt of different races. Hel, that makes Neanderthals more enlightened than you.

Okay, I’ve railed enough on this. If you’re folkish, I hope I’ve enlightened you why you’re racist even if you think you’re not. If you are looking at anyone’s ethnicity and determining whether someone can do something based on it or not, you are a fucking racist. Period.

Five Bad Reasons for Becoming a Heathen

March 17, 2018 The Rational Heathen Comments 0 Comment

I ran into an interesting post on Patheos entitled 5 Bad Reasons to Become a Pagan. It’s an interesting post, but it seems to cover more Wiccan than Heathen issues. So, like any good Viking, I’ve raided the subject and decided to talk about the five bad reasons for becoming a Heathen. Maybe you agree with me; maybe you don’t. Whatever. But here is my list.

Bad Reason #1: You Want to Join a Whites-Only (Neo-Nazi) Religion

If you’ve hung out on my blog for any length of time, you knew this would be one of the bad reasons. We don’t want white supremacists or Neo-Nazis for the simple fact that they are a foul pollutant to our religion and we do not believe what they believe. The history of Heathen belief bears this out.

Our ancestors belief in “race” was much different than identifying with the color of one’s skin. Instead, they discriminated on religious beliefs, class, and political alliances. So if you were a Viking from Scandinavia who believed in the Heathen gods, you were considered a vastly different person than the Anglo-Saxon who believed in Christ, rightly or wrongly. Now, if you were from Nubia (an African country) and had dark skin, you were considered the same race as Christians who had white skin because you believed in Christ. If you were another color, Heathens didn’t care as long as you worshiped the Heathen gods and allied yourself with the kindreds they were in. So, your allies were considered the same as you.

As Heathens, we accept that the gods call people who are of a different ethnicity than those whose ancestors have come from the Northern European lands. We are not here to judge our gods’ choices as to whom they wish as followers. Although skin color may be an issue today, Heathens should be inclusive when it comes to following our gods.

Bad Reason #2: You Want to Worship Our Gods Because You’re a Marvel Fan

You know, it’s okay to be introduced to the Heathen gods through Marvel, but if you’re becoming a Heathen because you find Tom Hiddleston or Chris Hemsworth sexy, maybe what you’re looking for isn’t a religion but a fan club. You shouldn’t worship Loki because you’re enamored with Hiddleston. Believe me, you aren’t the only one coming into the Northern religions because of the movies. The rest of us who are serious are going to sigh in disgust. We’re not a place for you to live out your fantasies when it comes to actors, so you might as well go someplace else.

The other issue is that the Marvel Thor universe is only loosely based on our mythology. There are plenty of differences, so don’t think you’re coming into a religion that is like the movies or the comics.

Bad Reason #3: You Have a Drinking Problem and You Want to Hide It

Heathens drink mead. A lot. We have rites that use mead quite often. Both the blot and the sumbel use mead, and drinking often accompanies our holidays (which are many). That being said, Odin states the following in the Havamal (11 – 14):

11.
A better burden can no man bear
on the way than his mother wit:
and no worse provision can he carry with him
than too deep a draught of ale.

12.
Less good than they say for the sons of men
is the drinking oft of ale:
for the more they drink, the less can they think
and keep a watch o’er their wits.

13.
A bird of Unmindfulness flutters o’er ale feasts,
wiling away men’s wits:
with the feathers of that fowl I was fettered once
in the garths of Gunnlos below.

14.
Drunk was I then, I was over drunk
in that crafty Jötun’s court.
But best is an ale feast when man is able
to call back his wits at once.

[Translation Source]

You can argue whether these are really Odin’s words transcribed, but most Heathens accept it as wisdom. So, if you’re an alcoholic, or a borderline alcoholic, who wants to use Heathenry as an excuse to drink, go to rehab. Seriously. We need people who have their wits about them and not people who use Heathenry as an excuse to drink.

Bad Reason #4: You Want to Use Heathenry as an Extended Version of Cosplay

I’m probably going to step on toes here, but if you’re using Heathenry just to dress up in cool clothing and armor, swing swords and carry medieval weapons, maybe you need to either be in an reenactment group or the SCA and not a Heathen. Certainly there are Heathens in reenactment groups and the SCA, and there’s no reason why they shouldn’t be there. The problem is when those people don’t take their Heathen beliefs seriously. Look, I get that there are atheist and agnostic Heathens out there, but they still take their lore seriously (maybe a little too seriously for my taste). No, I’m not saying that you need to become a recon asshat who insists that everything be done according to their (or some Asa-pope’s) interpretation of what the ancestors did, but at least you’re interested in the archaeology, lore, Eddas, writing, and the past.

Bad Reason #5: You Want to Be a Powerful Magic User

Oh gods, here I am using the “M” word (magic) again. (I’m fairly skeptical about magic, so bear with me on this.) Heathenry has a limited amount of magic — we have seidr, we have runes, we have gods and giants, we have wights and other supernatural critters, we have berserkers and ulfhednar and whatnot. We have our own lore and magic that surrounds it. That being said, if you’re really looking for playing with magic a lot, you need to check out other pagan beliefs, most notably, Wiccan. It’s not that most Heathens wouldn’t welcome you into the fold; it’s just that you’ll be disappointed with Heathenry because we really don’t have what you’re looking for. Other pagan beliefs have more magical tendencies. The Heathen magic is usually communicating with wights and gods, being possessed by a supernatural entity, foretelling the future, wards, and making requests to entities in the form of blots. I’m not saying you can’t become powerful in your own right, but in many cases, you’ll find the magic somewhat lacking.

There are other bad reasons that are valid when it comes to becoming a Heathen.. Maybe you have some thoughts on this as well?